Queen's Power

As mothers--as potential Queen’s for Eternity, I think the most powerful source that women have is LOVE. Love is truly the conqueror of all things in this life. Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ have told us that Love is the most important of all things. It is even given to us as the first and most important commandment.
In Mark 12:30-31 “And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment. And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.”
They set the example for us by showing us their love. Dallin H. Oaks said, “The eternal truth that Heavenly Father loves all His children is an immensely powerful idea....Love is the most powerful force in the world.”

God gave woman the natural tendencies to love and be compassionate. We have all the motherly qualities that equip us to be good mothers. Heavenly Father was so wise when he created babies. Babies are so easy to love, and when your own baby is put in your arms for the first time it just melts your heart.

For the most part it’s easy to love. But God will test us all, because trials will come to each of us where it will sometimes be difficult to love. These tests give us a chance to put true charity to work. One experience in particular taught me something valuable that has stayed with me. I found myself in a situation where I reacted in a very UN Christ-like way---and to make it worse it happened in the presence of 3 other people. Even though I felt like I might have been justified, I felt myself feeling hotly ashamed for several days. It was to the point where I could hardly function, and I was praying for relief and forgiveness. Then it came…a quote that was printed in bold letters in an article in the Church News (of which I don’t remember the article but I’ve never forgotten the quote) “Until we are confronted with a situation that requires a Christ-like response, there is no real test to emulating his character.” I learned such a valuable lesson. I’ve learned to try and remember in such circumstances that it’s an opportunity to put to practice what the Lord is trying to teach us. To love.

Sometimes the hardest place to love and the place where we receive the most practice is right in our own homes. Have you heard it said that we are often more polite to strangers than we are to our own family? I came across something in a women’s conference talk by Elaine Cannon one day back in 2001 that I wrote in one of my journals, “We need more diligent women to love their husbands into gentility or to just love their husbands and children better. If they haven’t done either yet, then we need them to open their hearts and extend the reach of their affection and effectiveness to others…the Lord needs women who will take upon themselves His ways, His will, and His work, as well as His name. If each of us will begin to do this with the power that is in us, we will soon notice a mighty change in our lives. Trials and troubles won’t get the better of us. The gates of hell will not prevail against us, and the heavens will shake for our good (D&C 21:6). Our hearts and our homes will be filled with unspeakable love....Good will be done.”

Note that she didn’t just say “we need more women“…she said “we need more diligent women.” Diligent in the dictionary is “constant in effort to accomplish something; attentive and persistent in doing anything; done or pursued with preserving attention; painstaking.” That sounds like it is going to take some constant effort, but if love is something that God commands us to do, He will help us to find a way if we really try. I love how Sister Cannon says, “women who will take upon themselves His ways, His will, and His work, as well as His name.” We may not have a story book life with a happily ever after---we may have the hard, hard work of the Lord. Families and family life was part of His plan. And though much happiness can be obtained in family life, for a Mother that is not always easy as so much rests upon her shoulders for the welfare of the entire family. But if we truly are willing to do the Lord’s work, and to do it His way and not our way, we truly will become blessed…we truly will become an Eternal Queen.

I have four wonderful daughters and for the most part I have a very good relationship with each one of them. But I have not been without my times of struggle with them in various ways. Raising teen-agers into today’s world, with all the worldly influences pulling them away, many mothers have found themselves in very difficult circumstances with their children being rebellious as they try to teach them to do right and good. I have one daughter whose moods can get very intense. For a few years there I can’t tell you how many times she ran into her room shouting at the top of her lungs “I hate you!” and slamming her door. One time I flew into fits of hysterical laughter as I was watching from down the hallway and could have sworn I saw the whole wall lean with the slam of that door. She came out of her room even more angry and proceeded to hit me over and over with a pillow, making me laugh harder, which made her madder till she finally ended up laughing, too! Usually I would just end up feeling discouraged or crying. But as I prayed to know what to do the message that kept coming was “just love her." I found that anger, or grounding or anything opposite to love only made things worse. If I was gentle and patient and just put my arms around her or said, “Have I told you today how much I love you?” it would melt her heart and things would be better. She never stayed mad for long, and was always sorry. But it is rough on mothers to hear a child constantly saying they hate you or showing any form of disrespect. We certainly deserve better.
It makes me think of a quote by Joseph Smith, “When persons manifest the least kindness and love to me, O what power it has over my mind, while the opposite course has a tendency to harrow up all the harsh feelings and depress the human mind.” People would often ask Joseph Smith why he had so many followers, and his answer to that was “..because I possess the principle of love. All I can offer the world is a good heart and a good hand.”
To express words of love is so simple a thing really, compared to what awesome power it has.
CS Lewis put it this way: “The rule for all of us is perfectly simple. Do not waste time bothering whether you ‘love’ your neighbour; act as if you did. As soon as we do this we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you loved someone, you will presently come to love him.”

Sometimes we have to keep trying to love when we receive nothing in return, and maybe we find ourselves trying to love where only hate is given. Let this scripture bring you comfort:
Doctrine & Covenants 12:37 “If they have not charity, it matterth not unto thee, thou has been faithful. …And because thou has seen thy weakness thou shalt be made strong….”

Abraham Lincoln had many enemies. His friends would say, why do you try to make friends with your enemies. To which he replied, “Am I not destroying my enemies when I make them my friends.”

I’ve watched some of my girls struggle with their testimony and fall away from the church. I pray for them often. The Lord has manifest peace to my mind on many occasions concerning them. One thought that came powerfully was, “Love shines light into dark places.” I’ve heard stories of parents who have disowned their children or threatened them with various consequences if they, for instance, did not get married in the temple. What a heart-breaking shame, when that parent might have just loved them where they were at and just continued to set a righteous example to them on the way they lived their life…hopefully in following the Savior with full purpose of heart.

For those who have read the Harry Potter books, I found amazing spiritual analogies as I read those. (On the surface that’s the last thing you would think---but JK Rowling must have sensed the things she knew in the pre-existence to have come up with the story line she did) At the end of reading all 7 books my conclusion was an analogy of love. In each and every book, Harry comes up against extreme danger, and barely escapes. He represents good fighting evil. He’s just a young boy who suddenly found out who he was. (A wizard with power.) And that the worse power of evil on the planet was out to destroy him. But by the end of each book he has conquered evil without understanding how he did it. By the end of the 7th book you realize by what power he really did conquer that evil each time, and that was because of love. He knew what it was like to live life without any love and when he found love in his friends he knew it was the best thing in the world. He held the power of LOVE and Lord Voltemort never would! At the very end, Harry took the power of his love and was willing to lay down his life in order to save his friends---and he won. Evil was destroyed and he lived because he gave his all out of pure love. Does this remind you of another? Our Savior. He conquered Satan because He was willing to give His life for all of us. He died that we might live again. And it was because of the power of His love for us that He was able to do this great thing. Jesus Christ IS love.

So, let LOVE be the ruling power in your life.

“For the power is in them, wherein they are agents unto themselves. And inasmuch as men do good they shall in nowise lose their reward.” (D&C 58:28)

“Let us cheerfully do all things that lie in our power and then may we stand still, with the utmost assurance, to see the salvation of God, and for his arm to be revealed.” (D&C 123.17)